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Granted, Vikings come through a time portal and axe it to bits, destroying the need for reformating. They also pillage you and your neighborhood, then light it on fire. I wish I had a bouncy red ball.

Granted, but it eats you.

I wish I had a pet penguin.

granted, but when your outside this falcon comes out of nowhere takes out your eye and flys off with it. While your dazed and in a pain a hippo starts chargeing at you and eats you. While your in his stomach the acid burns off one of your arms before you cut open its belly to escape. The dead hippo attarcts lions and hyenas and chase you for 2 miles lobbing your acid eaten arm and somewhat healed eye socket. All of a sudden gravity doesn't seem to apply to you and drift of into the sky; you go unconcius from the minimal air pressure and you wake up in a space on the moon, you don't know how... . You spend the rest of your life eating poop sandwiches and nothing but pong to entertan you

THE END

I wish for a waffle with a whipped cream frowny face .

Granted. But Deathknight comes along and roffles your waffles.

I wish I had a sexy red head chic in my bed RIGHT NOW!

Granted, but she's a lesbian.

ADDITION:
I wish to become this smilie ->>

Granted, but this smiley ---> turns you into this smiley --->

I wish Fraiser was still in production. (HINT for Cronus: It's a spinoff of Cheers starring Kelsey Grammar and David Hyde Pierce)

[I'd respond if I knew anything about Fraiser]

iwsh granted but they cancel the show for another show...

I wish i had money! lots of them!

Granted, but you waste it all at an auction to buy something lame (like a rockstar's guitar pic or something)

I wish I had abs of steel.

granted!

you Really HAVE abs of steaL! but when u swim u drown of the heaviness!

i wish i had instant macoroni

Granted, but you die of metal poisoning

i wish i was the sexiest man alive

granted! but then the sexiest man UN-Live gets jealous and drags u down into the underworld

i wish i had 200 dollars

granted but the FBI arrest you for accepting money related in illigal activities

i wish i had 300 dollars!

Granted, but it's only Funny Munny™

ADDITION:
I wish I had 3000 minerals.

granted! but u get Rock Minerals!! And they land on ur head!

i wish i had 100 milkway candy bars

granted you choke and die

i wish i had a twix

granted! but the twix was infested with poison and u die


i wish i could go to sleep peacfully

GRANTED (MUHAHAHHA) you sleep forever and there is no price valiant to kiss you

i wish that i could pwn all noobs

WTF!! Since when are minerals not rocks??

You can't already? Fine, Granted but you become a noob yourself and pwn yourself into oblivioun.

I wish i owned Planet of the Apes

granted, you go to Blockbuster and rent it for $6.99

i wish school wasnt so competitive

[center]Granted, you die for no reason.

I wish I had a large supply of chemicals and materials for 'ßø|\/|bx0r making'... damn cops...[/center]

Granted, they explode in your basement.
I wish i had lived in Gondolin (secret city in The Silmarillion).

i mean like get rid of them once and for all

Granted... wtf is a gondolin? you get robbed and murdered.

i wish that noobs would be erased off of the earth with a big eraser