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Yes, it's 11:53pm and I cannot sleep. I went to get a hot pocket out of boredom, and as I glanced at the back to see the cooking time, and noticed the list of ingredients:

Ingedients: UNBLEACHED ENRICHED FLOUR (wheat flour, malted barley flour, niacin, reduced iron, thiamin mononitrate, riboflavin, folic acid) WATER, HAM WATER ADDED GROUND AND FORMED, NATURAL SMOKE FLAVOR ADDED (cured with water, dextrose, salt, sodium phosphate, natural smoke flavor, sodium erythorbate, sodium nitrate) PART SKIM MOZARELLA CHEESE WITH MODIFIED FOOD STARCH (part skim mozarella cheese [paseurized milk, non-fat milk, cultures, salt, enzymes], modifed food starch, flavor, annatto), IMITATION CHEDDAR CHEESE (water, modified food starch, casein, soybean oil, whey, contains 2% or less of salt, sodium aluminum phosphatem sodium phosphate, lactic acid, sodium citrate, natural flavor, sorbic acid[preservative], artificial color) PASTEURIZED PREPARED CHEESE PRODUCT (mozarella cheese[milk, cheese culture, salt, enzymes], water, casein, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, food starch, whey, salt, sodium aluminum phosphate, sodium phosphate, lactic acid, natural flavor, sorbic acid [as a preservative], artificial color), SEASONING (whey, cheddar cheese[milk, cheese culture, salt, enzymes], buttermilk [milk, culture], enzyme modified cheddar cheese [milk, sodium citrate, cheese culture, salt, enzymes, potassium sorbate], salt, reduced lactose whey, coconut oil, maltodextrin, disodium phosphate, blue cheese [milk, cheese cilture, salt, enzymes], lactic acid, citric acid, yellow #5 and #6), CONTAINS LESS THAN 2% OF: PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED SOYBEAN OIL, PALM OIL (with enzymes), citric acid, lactic acid, artificial butter flavor, beta carotene), MODIFED FOOD STARCH, DIED WHEY, CHEESE SEASONING (whey, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, maltodextrin, cheddar/blue cheeses [pasteurized milk, cheese cultures, salt, enzymes] salt, nonfat milk, sodium casineate, sodium citrate, natural flavors, citric acid, yellow #6 and tumeric extract [color]), DOUGH CONDITIONERS (calcium sulfate, mono- and diglycerides, whey, salt, garlic powder, L-cysteine hydrochloride, tricalcium phosphate, enzymes, ethoxylated mono- and diglycerides), PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED PALM KERNEL OIL (with lecithin, citric acid as preservative), DRIED EGG YOLKS, SALT, SUGAR, YEAST, DRIED EGG WHITES, SOY FLOUR.



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I've written persuasive essays shorter than that.


EDIT: Yes, I spent some odd 10 minutes typing that out.

This probably the most educational topic I've ever seen on this website.

You're not kidding.


I've somewhat learned how to make pasteurized processed cheese product.



Mmmm, cheese product.

What kind of Hot Pocket is it? I like the Ham and Cheese

That would be it.


Be me so naive to expect the ingredients to be something along the lines of, I don't know, "BREAD, HAM, CHEESE"


?

The ham and cheese is the best... But for SOME STRANGE REASON (WHICH IS MOM!!) we always have Lean Pockets! I don't need to be leaner!! I like my balance fine just the way it is!!

lol, type down the ingredients. I wanna see the "lean"

Meh, then I would have to go to the freezer. Maybe tommorow.

I'm holding you to it.


Though I don't think I even know you.

That's one badass hotpocket!

Lol The freezer with all the good (frozen and microwaveable ) food is out in the garage, where the floor is cold cement, and chainsaw boxes and old slip 'n' slides litter the floor...
Addition: Wow, Hot Pockets attract a crowd!

what's your point, and did you copy all of that straight from the hot pocket ingredients bar or did you know what each general ingredient was made out of?

...He's bored so he did this... You better be eating that Hot Pocket Moonmonkey! Anyways: My Hot Pocket brings all the guys to the yard, and their like, "Mine's better than yours,"
"Yeah right, Ham 'n' Cheese pwns, your's tastes like farking shhhhhhhhhhlibadib."

Hey baby, you wanna see my hotpocket?

THey make the lists like that for legal reasons, not for educational ones. If you take out all the un needed stuff, you get.
FLOUR, (It's made of bread, this makes sense.) WATER, (Most everything you cook in a microwave needs to have water.) HAM, (Yummy goodness / half of the reason you bought the thing) FLAVORING, (TO enhance the yummy goodness in the ham) MOZARELLA CHEESE, (Cheese #1) AMERICAN CHEESE, (Basically modified chedder, and cheese #2) CHEESE PRODUCT, (simply a fancy way of saying another cheese) SOYBEAN OIL, (Soy oils = that mouth watering look / taste) PALM OIL, (Similar to soybean oil I suppose, although I haven't dabbled in it much) STARCH, (Ya, this is included in the bread part, but it is also added to the middle part, to make sure it stays the same solidity as the outside.) WHEY, (Good for you) SEASONING, (More yummy goodness) DOUGH CONDITIONERS, (Makes it crispy yet at the same time, mouthwateringly soft) PALM KERNEL OIL, (A more economically feasable version of vegetable oil) DRIED EGG YOLKS, (I'm guessing it has something to do with a flavoring) SALT, (Can't have any food with out a little) SUGAR, (To counter everything that makes this a hardcore lunch) YEAST, (Self explanitory, can't have good bread without it) DRIED EGG WHITES, (To go with the yolks, although less flavorful) SOY FLOUR. (flour dust thats better than regular flour.)

It's really not that complicated, but they have to do that for food allergies / intolerancies / lame governments who want to know what exactly they use. Ruins the spirit of cooking.

ohhhh.....ho ho.......ho.......hohoho............ho

The only good hot pocket is an authentic artificially processed one.

[center]Ingredients of this thread: Spam, WTF, STFU, contains less than 2% of the following, intelligence, laughability.[/center]

Mmm, synthetic food.

Laziness FTW!

Hot Pockets are being advertised over here in the UK now. They look so disgusting, like a pastry full of splooge and meaty chunks. I hate the jingle too, and the girl tucking in to one in the advert. My fears have been confirmed now that I've seen your ingredients list.

Flush Pockets! [/sing]

Booya!

This IS the null forum.