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Here's a new little quest for everyone.
All work and no play makes Moose a dull Moose.

Your quest - Make Moose laugh and he will give out minerals based on how funny he thought what you said was. Keep in mind he doesn't laugh as easily as the average person, nor does he share a typical sense of humor.

Neutral - Moose does not even smile. Maybe he even gets angry because you wasted his time. Sorry, no minerals for you.
Chuckle - Try harder, you're close to getting those minerals.
Keke - Moose laughs a little on the inside and the outside. You get a small prize. Moose has keke~!'d 5 times in this topic
LOL - Moose actually laughs out loud. You're getting some minerals. Moose has LOL'd 1 time in this topic
ROFL - Moose actually rolls on the floor laughing. This hasn't happened to him before, you've won a ton of minerals.
LMAO - Moose actually laughs his ass off. After a trip to the hospital to reattach his posterior, you will recieve a hefty amount of minerals.

RULES
1. Plain text only, no BBCodes, no pictures, no external links.
2. Maximum length of 200 words.
3. Must be age-appropriate (age 17 and below) (though I do love vulgarities, this is still SEN )
4. Author must not be an SEN member. You can use other people's jokes, provided they aren't SENers.
5. Must be original. While you can use jokes from other people or websites, make sure it isn't something I heard before. If you didn't write it, include a source.
6. Must not flame other members, period (exception - you can flame me ^_^). Feel free to burn celebrities, world leaders, etc.
7. One joke per post, must be at least 2 posts between each post you make for it to count.

your really bored arent you?

what would happen if you throw a bottles and bottles of jelly on the highway?


































a traffic jam!

Ban me

From Carlin (shortened and edited):

Call one of those How-Am-I-Driving 800 numbers and, just for fun, complain about a particular driver. Tell them he was driving on the sidewalk, vomiting, giving the finger to old women and dangeling a baby out of the window.

A man walks into a bar after a long hard day a work, sits down at the bar. No one else is in the the bar, as it just opened for the night and the bartender is washing some dishes in the back room. The guy is just about to call for the bartender and order his drink when he hears "Nice pants". He figure, it must have been his imagination, and calls for the bartender. He gets his drink, and halfway through it hears "I really like your hair". He's a little freaked out at this point, as he doesn't know where these voices are coming from. Finally, as he finishes his drink, pays, and is about to leave, he hears "Your tie is really great, I love how it matches your shirt". At this point, he is REALLY freaked out. So he asks the bartender "I keep hearing this voice, and it is saying all these nice things about me, what is it?". The bartender smiles and replies "Oh, that's just the complimentary peanuts."

a nuetron walks into a bar and says id like a beer

The bartender gives the beer

How much will that be? asks the nuetron

For you? replies the bartender no charge

What did the smoker ask the self-propagating wave?

Got a Light?

where do smart kids come from?

from your mom's smart ass!

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"

I find humor within' itself that we are all so blatantly stupid enough to try to make him laugh.

I could crack dead baby jokes, but that would mainly humor myself.

Windows IT (Intoxicated)



The Second Gulf Conflict

Do we get unlimited entries?

Do we get unlimited entries?

My real name is Mike and I live in Сanada

DTBK doesn't tank well...

Cracka Please


I wanted to be a rapper when I was a kid, which surprises people 'cause I'm a cracker. I like saying the C word though. I'm like "Me and my cracker friends are driving down the street in my Vovlo Station Wagon and I'm say 'Cracker, pass the sunchips.' He's says 'Not till we get to the picnic cracka.'"
And I say, 'Cracka please.'
He's like, 'Cracka whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!'"

mini moose is actually an under cover nazi.
he has the last name "hitler"
but its usually Chuck H. Norris

Okay one day there was a momma dinosaur and a 5-yearold dinosaur. They went into a bar. The momma dino asked for a diet milk. The bartender asked "cant you supply your own son milk" so then the momma dino said " go eff yourself"
right when the momma went to check on her son the 5-year old was at a track and feild race. He thought they were dinner so he ate them. By the time he returned to the bar the momma dinosaur said "Elgar how many times do I have to tell you DONT EAT FAST FOOD!"

1 + 1 = 1 ^ 1

I'm smarter! Oh wait...nvm...

Why did the chicken cross the road?
















to get to the other side.

[sub]I wish I was funny enough to make you laugh, guess I just suck. [/sub]

Excerpt from "The Daily Show":

Interviewer: I understand that your town has a bald eagle problem.
Mayor: That's right.
Interviewer: Why do you want to get rid of bald eagles? Are you unpatriotic?
Mayor: There are too many of them, it's becoming a problem.
Interviewer: Mr. Mayor, Eagles founded our great nation.
Mayor: No, people founded our nation. Eagles became the national bird after our nation that was founded was founded.
Interviewer: You may know a lot about the nation that was founded, but eagles are a symbol of America, they represent freedom and liberty.
Mayor: It doesn't matter, they're damaging property, staining cars, eating our fish...
Interviewer: So you're saying if there were hundreds of Ben Franklins walking around, eating cod and shizting on cars, that would be a bad thing?
Mayor: Uhh...
Interviewer: What could be more beautiful?

This is my most orignal joke that I made. I have a copywrite for it just incase anyone steals it.


Why did the boy bring out a butterfly net during the winter time...........










































He wanted to catch a cold

GUESS WHO I AM...