Staredit Network

The rain filled the night air in the city streets, drumming on the pavements like a mad percussionist and throwing up spray as it hit the dark asphalt. A solitary street lamp glowed on the corner between Park Road and Maple Street, its yellow light illuminating the heavy droplets on their earthward journey. In the circle of lit pavement beneath the lamp stood a woman in a red dress and a long coat, clasping an umbrella. A lady of the night, some might have called her. She drew her coat around her against the cold. It was made of dark brown leather. A man suddenly appeared at the edge of the glow cast by the lamp. He wore a black cloak and a top hat under which a face, dark and shadowy, lurked.

“You must be soaked,” he said as he approached.
“Little bit,” replied the woman, fumbling for something in her pockets. “You got a light?” she asked, holding up a cigarette, one hand on her hip.
“I’m afraid I don’t smoke,” said the man in apology. His tone was strange – somehow menacing. “Why do you stand here on such a horrid night?” he asked.
“Well, I have to make ends meet somehows, don’t I? I’m waiting for a client – name’s Jack.”
“I am Jack,” said the man.
“Mr. Jack Brown?”
“Yes.”

The man reached into one of his pockets and drew out a pair of black leather gloves. He began to pull them on slowly.

“So, are we gonna stand here all night or get down to business – “
“I have no sympathy for women in your line of work,” the man interrupted. “You disgrace our society by selling your flesh.”

As the man produced a six-inch knife from his jacket pocket the woman realised what was happening. This was the Jack – Jack the Ripper. She tried to scream but no sound would come out of her mouth. The knife’s blade glittered in the lamplight as the Ripper stabbed again and again. He became frenzied, hacking and slicing at her body as it fell to the wet floor. His top hat fell off and rolled into the gutter, revealing a handsome man with black hair, his features twisted into a hideous smile as he pulled the knife out for the last time. The rain was already washing the blood from the blade. The woman’s body lay in the light of the street lamp. The Ripper drew himself up and took a deep breath.

“Tonight you sold your flesh to me, whore. See what I have done with it.” He threw money at the corpse. “Here is your payment.”

Nice story, but i think youll have to edit it if you even want to consider a PG Rating!

Well, the bedtime story status was meant to be ironic.

It was just something I threw together in 5 mins.

Ah i thought so, you should tell that at a campfire one night if you err ever go camping.

Roffles, the last line was hilarious.

And pretty much awesome.

The whole way you described the scene was chilling, even if it's just a little thing you made in like 5 minutes, it still had mood.

Falcon, Dark, i know your there, i suggest you post and not be a stranger

That's why I did. Your post is 1 minute after mine, therefore I am vastly superior to you ;P

I didn't really like it a whole lot. My reasoning? Well, it really seems hastily written, and through you use plenty of adjectives, they're too often simplistic. Needs a definition rewrite, but the opening descriptive paragraph is better then the dialogue/murder.

Did you type it first? I find when I write with pencil, I write better.

The topic got my attention because my first name is Jack.

Actually, I didn't see the twist coming. The clues were pretty darn obvious, but I was just thinking "Oh, she's a prostitute." When suddenly she's being stabbed. It was nice for a little impulsive bit of writing.

Well yes, it was hastily written, and I ran out of motivation halfway through - you're very perceptive, Wilhelm.

I was tempted to use adjectives like 'luciferous,' but then realised that I couldn't be bothered. I always type my stuff rather than write it - my parents would probably be horrified if they found that sort of thing lying about.

My parents dont even want me to use the computer at all except for Education sites, etc etc.. I FIGHT BACK... thats how i got to SEN and SC and SC:BW lol.

nice story cap'n crunch, ill sleep well tonight

What does that have to do with this topic?

Err? I dont know...