Report, edit, etc...Posted by JaFF on 2006-12-17 at 09:58:22
QUOTE
Entry: [14:03] The alien destroyed the transmitter before we could report what's happening here
Entry: [14:17] We sealed off our module so the infection doesen't spread
Entry: [14:22] The scanners showed that the alien's body temperature is 38.0°C
Entry: [14:38] The emergency transmitter will be automatically turned on in less than 25 minutes
Entry: [14:47] At least 1 human must be alive when the transmission is restored
Entry: [14:17] We sealed off our module so the infection doesen't spread
Entry: [14:22] The scanners showed that the alien's body temperature is 38.0°C
Entry: [14:38] The emergency transmitter will be automatically turned on in less than 25 minutes
Entry: [14:47] At least 1 human must be alive when the transmission is restored
This is for my Thing map. You can approach different computers on the map and each contains one of those messages. The survivors (that are now dead) were making reports in those computers so you can trace the storyline and get an overall picture of what led you to the situation you're in.
Can you understand the storyline from those 5 messages? Can you shorten them even more without cutting any information? And should I replace the word Report with a word Document? Are there any grammar mistakes? (I'm having doubts about the last one)
QUOTE
10 minutes until transmission restoration
Also, is thic gramatically correct? (the transmission will be automatically restored)
Please help.
Thanks in advance.
Report, edit, etc...Posted by Xx.Doom.xX on 2006-12-17 at 11:44:32
'doesn't' is spelled 'doesen't' in Report [14:17]
It depends on how big the message is. A report should be a big, important message, whereas a document should be something that has happened recently. So it's up to you.
I think Report [14:03] is a waste. I think you should change it to 'Report [14:03] No Data Available' because who wrote the report? Did the computer just make it up?
'Report [14:47]' should be a mission objective, or it doesn't matter. That's optional.
It depends on how big the message is. A report should be a big, important message, whereas a document should be something that has happened recently. So it's up to you.
I think Report [14:03] is a waste. I think you should change it to 'Report [14:03] No Data Available' because who wrote the report? Did the computer just make it up?
'Report [14:47]' should be a mission objective, or it doesn't matter. That's optional.
Report, edit, etc...Posted by Mini Moose 2707 on 2006-12-17 at 11:50:32
In the last one, at least is two words.
Report, edit, etc...Posted by JaFF on 2006-12-17 at 11:50:51
My idea is that groups of survivors wrote those reports... until they all died. And the first report is very important since it explains why can't you just report what's happening to other parts of the ship.
The last report, combined with the [14:22] report, should give you this hint:
If at least one human is alive, he will tell how to check if someone's a thing or not. So if everyone's alien by the time the transmission starts working again, the other crew members won't know how to reveal a thing in a human form.
Any suggestions on how to write it so it's not bigger than 1 line in SC?
Edit: So anyone has any ideas on how to squeeze the red part into one line?
The last report, combined with the [14:22] report, should give you this hint:
If at least one human is alive, he will tell how to check if someone's a thing or not. So if everyone's alien by the time the transmission starts working again, the other crew members won't know how to reveal a thing in a human form.
Any suggestions on how to write it so it's not bigger than 1 line in SC?
Edit: So anyone has any ideas on how to squeeze the red part into one line?
Report, edit, etc...Posted by green_meklar on 2006-12-17 at 11:59:31
QUOTE
Can you understand the storyline from those 5 messages?
Uh...not really.
QUOTE
should I replace the word Report with a word Document?
Or 'Entry', yeah.
QUOTE
Are there any grammar mistakes? (I'm having doubts about the last one)
On the fourth one, 'within' should probably be 'in'. On the fifth one, I think 'will be' should be 'is'.
QUOTE
I think Report [14:03] is a waste. I think you should change it to 'Report [14:03] No Data Available' because who wrote the report? Did the computer just make it up?
I think it means that they couldn't transmit the report, not that they couldn't write it down on the computer.
Report, edit, etc...Posted by JaFF on 2006-12-17 at 12:44:34
Can you say like this?
QUOTE
10 minutes until transmission restoration