So, we were discussing The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne in class. Not a big fan of the style; a decent book. I hate over analyzing, so this is what I deducted from all of that:
Pearl is actually an acronym for a government cover up that was started when the Native Americans first met The Black Man in the Forest, who was really an alien trying to get to Germany so that he could get some Belgium Waffles. Unfortunately, he had to settle for Kerry, who wouldn't come for centuries later. Well, we never really find out what Pearl stands for, only that it was used to cover up the true story behind Frankenstien. He's not really the doctor, you know. That was just a story made up so that his true form could be covered up through a long system of pyscho-mutations. Originally, Frankenstein was created to protect and love the people who entered the land of Zen, as the "New World" was called at the time. However, he grew rusty and water leaked through to his nuclear brain, causing some mad chemical reactions to take place. So he blew up and gave birth to China.
The world will never let you know that; they made up a false history and everything for them. How else did Zen in China get started, do you think? Well anyways, so China is busy going through this whole deal with oppression and love and hate and spirituality when on the other side of the world amist the remenents of Frankenstein a black flower is bloomed. Now, ask any outstanding Literary Scholar and they'd tell you that it actually represented jealous and rage, but come now people; when was the last time an author wanted to symbolize that? All those Literary Scholars are on the government payroll says I; and they've taken an oath of silence against the issue. Just look at their resume, fifth line down column C. How many resumes have a column C? Only the ones on the government payroll.
Oh. And Chillingworth is actually the priest and Dimmsdale the Doctor; they've been trying to play the whole village all at once, just to add a twist. Chillingworth (also called Chilly) is actually Frosty the Snowman. Through a series of mistranslations (ultimately brought on by the goldfish. See next paragraph), his name was changed to Chilly. Needed a bit more dignification, Hawthorne (the master gold fish that ruled them) added 'ingworth; to the end. So he didn't really go into the Forest to chill with his Indian friends (who were the creators of crop circles and still are), he went to some snotty suburbia-america town to go play catch with a bunch of good for nothing kids. Word got around that he was really an albino, and the parents didn't understand the word so told their children not to touch him, until one day he dressed up like a snowman and everyone was happy.
Now, the Scarlet Letter, the namesake for the book, was the origin of the great Goldfish Empire. They took over the world, but having no opposable thumbs left it to someone else to rule. He blew up and created zen and china, remember him? Hawthorne wouldn't have it, for he was the great leader, so he fabricated a great past and story which has more truth to it than meets the eye.
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it's satire, so it counts as creative work right?
I have to read the Scarlet Letter during Spring break and the test is in March 5th. I thought it was going to be one of those boring Romanticisim Novels in which everybody dies. Now I see that I'll have a harder time reading it simply because from what you've said, the author is crazy.